Monday, March 26, 2007

Parlez Freakin Vous Angalise

Who makes words?

At first glance it sounds like a ridiculous question.

At second glance, it still sounds the same. And to some of my stubborn friends, it runs well into the sixteenth and seventeenth glance.

But seriously, who invents words? Who said "let 'to be' be a verb! Let this thing that makes funny sounds be called a piano. And this thing that awkwardly juts out of my body be called a… a nose!"

Who is this all knowing authority?
I say we put our feet down. Let's question everything. Let's make our own rules.
And if you're reading this at WORK, let's whisper it.

In my endeavor to create a new world 'of the people and by the people', I've decided to replace some words in the English language, evolve my own meaning of words, and pretty much create my own words. This is a democracy of course. So, let me know what you think.
And I'll let you know where you can 'PUT' your thoughts.

Let's begin.

The wind instrument Tuba will no longer be called tuba, but will be replaced by the word Flatula. The noises are the same, I think the word fits.

The female mammary glands will no longer be called breasts. Instead, I've come up with (drum roll please) ' Thingamajigglelots"

The male organ will hence be known as pokeyhontas.

will simply be spelt differently to connote what they actually mean. DieMen.
Since they kill them financially.

Flowers will be known by their scientific name from now on - Sorry Facilitators. All of them will be from the some genus – Fergotyorbuday Heressum Prettytree

The word Pornography, for reasons unbeknownst to me, has been associated with something wrong. I figure it's purely educational, and hence its new name can either be – Howdeydoodat or Wheredeyputdat.
Unless you have something better of course.

Politics. Poly meaning many and Tics meaning blood sucking insects. In all honesty, it's not fairs to the tics. Or any breathing creature for that matter to be compared to a politician. So I'm a bit stumped here. Anyone have a suggestion? Poly_______?

And if you have anymore words that you want to add to Jon's Dictionary, do write in and we'll stick it to the establishment.

Ciao for now.